Profound confession

When a soul comes into this world it is innocent. It finds itself unconscious - unaware of itself. It does not know about separation. It is not aware of male or female. It just is.

Recently I realized that I am a being not willing to accept separation. After 41 years I still find myself in a state where I do not accept finding myself in a female body. My heart and my soul are the ones of a child. Unconscious - genderless. Made female only by a counterpart. And when men force sudden, obvious seduction, I feel lost. Instead of being able to building up a connection, I am forced back into this awareness of separation. Finding myself reduced to a female shell. In this separation I feel misunderstood, invisible, lonely - it is beyond words. The more I am longing for interpenetration, the more I feel the solitude. Simultaneously. The only way merging can happen is to subtile become porous, weightless, fluid, soft.

Seduction starts far away from embodiment, but if meant, it accomplishes there. And when so, it holds nothing less than the potential of profound healing. It is when separation, time and space disolves. It is when the energy of souls coalescence. Air like, water like, fire like. It is the state, where human beings ultimately are meant to be.